But the greatest of these is love

This morning I had the privilege of attending the sealing of a very dear friend in the Salt Lake Temple. This particular friend was the first girl I trained in the mission, and despite the fact that we were only companions for a grand total of three weeks, I loved – and still love – her very dearly. That, if nothing else, is evidence that time is not requisite for love. And I would say that, given the day’s events, it’s not surprising that my thoughts this evening have turned in that very direction.

If there is one thing I can say about my life, it’s that it has been abundantly blessed with and by love, both given and received. When I think of the word "love", numberless scenes from my scant twenty-six years of life flash through my mind. But as I sat down to write this, three in particular stood out to me. If you’ll humor me, I’d like to share them and what they mean to me.

The first picture that comes to mind is that of a sea green satin dress. This memory stretches back some twenty years and lay forgotten for a good fifteen of those. When I was young my mother used to make many of my dresses. Not long before my fifth or sixth birthday we picked out a pattern and fabric of my choosing and my mother set to work. However the day before my birthday rolled around and the dress was still far from finished. I went to bed distraught that night, having little hope that the dress would be finished in time for my birthday. Imagine my surprise and delight when I awoke to find my completed dress sitting on my desk. I’m sure that in my excitement (and youthful egocentrism) I didn’t even think to thank my mother. I’d like to think that I at least understood something of the sacrifice she made, but I suspect that the bleary-eyed image of my mother’s face may be a picture painted by a much more cognizant and thoughtful twenty-year old me. This quiet expression of love was forgotten for more than a decade and a half, only to resurface, unprompted, as I sat staring out the rain drenched window of the bi-college bus, then a junior in college. Then and there, and with a catch in my throat, I called my mother and thanked her.

The second experience happened this summer. On our cross country journey from New Jersey to Utah, my mother and I stopped in Colorado for a few days to visit my brother and his family. This is the family I lived with for six months in Georgia while my brother was deployed in Afghanistan. In that time we became very close, and I had an especially close bond with my little niece Hannah. When we arrived, Hannah was asleep on the couch, having tried but failed to forgo her nap in her excitement for our visit. As we chatted with my brother and sister-in-law, Hannah stirred a bit and was a little fussy, not recognizing us at first. But as soon as she did, she climbed into my lap, put her little arms around my neck and her little head on my shoulder and fell back asleep. When she stirred again a few minutes later she looked up at me and said "I love you."

The last image that comes to mind is that of four elders standing outside my apartment door. I had been sick for days, and upon finding out just how sick I was, these elders from my district had come to give me a blessing – and to give me a hard time for not calling them sooner. After administering the blessing, they left only after making me promise to call them – day or night – if I needed anything.

Though each paints a different picture of love, these experiences are linked in my mind and memory by the way in which they helped me to feel the love of God. As beautiful and poignant as these memories are on their own, they become that much more powerful when viewed through the lens of eternity and appreciated as evidence of not only the love of these earthly friends and family but also the love of a heavenly Friend and Father.

In speaking of the love of God, President Uchtdorf has said:

"Think of the purest, most all-consuming love you can imagine. Now multiply that love by an infinite amount—that is the measure of God’s love for you.

God does not look on the outward appearance. I believe that He doesn’t care one bit if we live in a castle or a cottage, if we are handsome or homely, if we are famous or forgotten. Though we are incomplete, God loves us completely. Though we are imperfect, He loves us perfectly. Though we may feel lost and without compass, God’s love encompasses us completely."

This phrase is forever coupled in my mind with the distinct and powerful impression that came to me upon hearing it, namely that I do not need to earn God’s love. None of us do. He loves us because we are His children. He loves me because I am His daughter, and He loves me no matter what. This knowledge is my greatest source of comfort and strength. Being an instrument in the Lord’s hands in helping others to feel that love is my greatest joy.

In the end it’s all about love. It is and must be the guiding compass in our life. That is why the two great commandments are commandments of love – love God and love others. In putting this into practice we find a definite pattern of service for our lives. Everything we do should be with the intent to serve others, for that is how our Savior lived. In response to the question, "Who is my neighbor?" the Savior gave the parable of the Good Samaritan and changed the question asked to "Who was neighbor to him that fell among the thieves?" or, in other words, "To whom am I a neighbor?" It’s not about who our neighbor is, but about who we are a neighbor to.

President Uchtdorf continues his talk saying,

"God the Eternal Father did not give that first great commandment because He needs us to love Him. His power and glory are not diminished should we disregard, deny, or even defile His name. His influence and dominion extend through time and space independent of our acceptance, approval, or admiration.

No, God does not need us to love Him. But oh, how we need to love God!"

God does not need us to love Him because He is love. His power and glory does not come from our love or admiration for Him but from His infinite and all encompassing capacity to love. Thus we see that giving truly is greater than receiving, that loving is more important than being loved. As we love others, we take upon ourselves those very same divine characteristics that render God so glorious. And if others do not love us, it does not diminish who we are. If we are misunderstood and misjudged (and we very often are) is does not diminish us or our value. Our happiness, our value, our glory is in how and what we choose to love.

I can choose love. I cannot choose who loves me, but I can choose love, and that is empowering. It may not change others and it may not change situations, but it will change me. And so I choose love.